Four years ago, I started this blog as a way to cope with the stress of moving into a fixer-upper.
This was the first official post I ever wrote about our home, and I am sharing it with you today to commemorate our upcoming 4th House-iversary coming up. Enjoy!
What We Discovered In Our Foreclosure
Mr. Smith and I have become quite the archaeologists since moving into our 100-year-old fixer-upper. Over the past month we have made such a variety of discoveries that I’ve decided to classify them among the following categories:
Just Plain Scary
(I blame the romanticism of HGTV for this category)
Specimen A: A house this old should have heart-pine floors hiding under all this murder-stained carpet. There’s wood under there, alright. Plywood subflooring.
Specimen B: A house this old should be graced with solid oak doors and crystal knobs. Instead, there are hollow panel doors, most of which are missing door knobs and have holes punched in them.
Specimen C: A house this old should have an old painting sitting in the attic with an original copy of the Constitution tucked behind its canvas. All we found was a large live-animal trap.
(Thank goodness for these!)
Specimen A: We discovered a well in the back yard which means we won’t have to pay a fortune to keep this massive yard green!
Specimen B: Crock-pots really are as great as people say they are! For the five years we lived in our rental, I may have used the crock-pot 3 times. But since we do not own an oven yet, I have been forced to explore the world of crock-pot cooking. Dinner is easy to make, easy to clean up and the kitchen doesn’t get heated up! (we don’t have A/C…yet)
Specimen C: Replacing the plumbing took a lot less time and money than we expected. (The plumbers discovered a lot of junk under our house in the process.)
Just Plain Scary:
(I need hot shower.)
Specimen A: A crack pipe is found in the uppermost room.
Specimen B: A knife with a bent blade is also discovered in this room.
Specimen C: A used condom is found on a closet shelf in one of the upstairs bedrooms.
Specimen D: A Playboy subscription renewal letter is found in the downstairs bathroom.
Specimen E: Yeah, about that large animal trap in the attic. What thing was up there that the former tenants tried to catch??
Specimen F: A white supremacist flyer in an orange baggie on our front lawn. (And on every front yard of our neighborhood)
Specimen G: Black widows, dead squirrels, fire ants, unidentifiable brown, hairy clumps on the floors of the uppermost room, light switches that turn nothing on…the list of scaries goes on and on.
Mr. Smith and I don’t have to dig too deep to find evidence of the lives that have passed through this old house. And our wacky list of odds and ends grows daily. However, our biggest discovery is that we are a lot braver than we thought.